Hi. My name is Erika.
Whether we’ve been friends (because social media says so), or we’re new together in this space, I’m glad you’re here.
I turned 40 last month. I’m young for many, old for others, and yet for some – at the perfect age.
With age comes experience, and with experience comes story. I love story – the power of story, the creativity found in storytelling, the vulnerability that impacts others due to sharing both the joyous and sorrow-filled…story. There’s the overarching larger story of that which is life. Included in that larger overarching story are many, many, many tiny tales that bring the overarching narrative together.
I’m here to tell my story. One human’s story out of billions.
My deep hope is that while I tell my story, I am brave enough to reveal the hard parts; to tell truths in a way that is both honest, but gracious. May my storytelling breed healing, inspiration, discomfort, and growth – both in myself, and you as the reader.
This is the point in time in which you find me: Fabulous, Feral, and 40. Ha! Let us commence.
There’s this thing called trauma. Buzzword these days – maybe. But, let’s keep talking about it. I have a trail of traumas – from childhood through adulthood. While some of them may come up with time, I’m going to talk about those “moments that changed everything.”
Healing, detaching, and vulnerably showing up for myself has been the hardest work I’ve ever done. Yet, I live to tell the tale.
As we dive in, here’s what you need to know:
- I am the eldest millennial daughter who fights to break generational patterns.
- I was married in 2014 after moving back from Honduras where I lived for 7 years and met my ex. I divorced in 2022, the first in my mother’s family line.
- I am an adoptive mom of a 6-year-old boy. I have wrestled my way through my own fertility journey and the story of Isaiah (“God Saves”) has caused me to see my own womanhood differently.
- I am an Enneagram 8 (The Challenger). An 8 is admired for their strength, assertiveness, and protective nature. We are disliked often for our intensity, and need for control. If you are unfamiliar with the Enneagram, it’s a great tool to get to know yourself, and others. The thing about the #8 is that if you’re a woman, you’re “not supposed to admit it.” A man can easily be admired for his strength in this world, but a woman is often looked at as a b*tch. I’ve decided to admit it anyway.
- For about 5 years, I’ve been doing some intense trauma recovery. Spiritual abuse and navigating the aftermath of divorce are two of the larger stories included in the overarching narrative. Rebuilding my life has required resilience and grit, but the indirect results have included growing in tenderness, and the experience of joy. Oh, the vulnerability!
- Professionally, I have given most of my work to the world of nonprofits, and social services. Starting in Honduras with helping build a Christian bilingual school and doing gang ministry, to moving back to the States and getting involved in the areas of homelessness, and telling stories about the incarcerated, each season has helped shape the lens through which I see the world.
- I am a Christian. AND, I have a complicated relationship with the Bible. Spiritual abuse has a way of doing that. When I returned from Honduras, I obtained my MA in Ministry Leadership. I knew I loved my line of work, but I did not want to “be like them” in my own leadership. I continue to deconstruct the parts of my faith that have been harmful, and in a very messy manner, I continue to reconstruct a faith that feels more real and wholesome. From time to time, I have the opportunity to teach from this place, and I’ve had to grow comfortable teaching what I know and believe to be true, while allowing the questions to live in the background.
My life is nothing like I thought it’d be. In that lies both the blessing, and the lesson.
I don’t know that I ever had a clear idea where life would take me, and I guess I always had a feeling I would be semi-untraditional in comparison to many I grew up with. Never did I think, however, that there would be such a stark contrast between the young woman I once was, and the woman I am today.
Fabulous, Feral, and 40 feels like a good time to rebrand, to live into what has for a long time been swelling inside of me.
Welcome to my StoryWave.
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